This is going to be a long one, because this book is so dense with shit to point out and dissect.

So now we get to the first proper chapter of the book, The Wild Heart. In nWoD books, the first chapter talks at length about the fluff before the later chapters put the crunch into its designated places, as a way of hooking you on the feel of the game before throwing all the nitty-gritty at you, and keeping you interested to see how everything works. In this book, the opening chapter serves to make you wish you were reading Werewolf, chewing thumbtacks, or that you were able to go back in time and just burn the money you spent on this fucking book.

The first fluff is a few pages of italicized in-character exposition called “Nature, Thou Art My Goddess.” In-character exposition has been done well in a few lines, especially in Changeling and (some of) Werewolf, but this is, as you can imagine, one of the many times that White Wolf’s bungled it. Allow me to sum it up in bullet points:

• Changing Breeds have always existed.
• Tacked-on Lovecraft reference to Great Old Ones possibly existing.
• The First were red in tooth and claw, hunting everything, life was good, etc etc Garden of Eden myth that was done infinitely better in Werewolf. I’m going to be saying that last part a lot, if you haven’t noticed.
• Everything was relatives and one, flesh and spirit mixed, and everything was fuckin’ each other. No, dead serious, that’s one of the ‘possibilities’ they mention except they expound upon it for a giant paragraph so you know which way they lean. The Snake was bangin’ Eve, women were all up on the beasts, lost gods were bangin’ mankind to make Nephilim, nobody could keep it in their pants.
• Nature with a capital N is alive and a thing. Totally not Gaia.
• Human intelligence is heavily implied to be evil.
• The Clever Monkey becomes Man the Conqueror and starts fucking Nature sideways. Not like that you weirdos.
• Changing Breeds could not be enslaved so they were cast out and killed.
• Religion is made, used to conquer natural world of spirits.
• Industry overtakes religion, now Man is The Despoiler.
• Nature has arbitrarily decided it’s time to actually fight back against Man for some reason instead of slapping its shit when the Industrial Revolution started, Changing Breeds begin campaign of ecoterrorism.

The opening paragraph after the story is absolutely hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

“Wow, you’re weird!” That’s the common litany of a shapechanger’s childhood. Whether those words are spoken in Bantu or Bronx English, the refrain’s the same. That weirdness isn’t always a bad thing, of course. As the child soon discovers, some people will find that oddness utterly compelling. “Animal magnetism” is more than just a phrase to a feral person. From childhood onward, it’s a fact of life.

Yes, you’re not just a weird kid picked on by bullies, you have the soul of a lion just waiting to get back at all those meanies! Christ, in middle school I was shut in a locker for a whole period and stuffed in a garbage can, but I never once thought it was because I was a special snowflake that they just couldn’t handle. Kids are just jackasses.

Anyway, children who will become ferals (I hate this term so much and the book doesn’t stop using it) often have the temperament of their animal self and have occasionally have birthmarks or habits that reflect it as well. And, wouldn’t you know it, it’s the hormones of puberty that activate your spirit self. How convenient.

The feral will feel kinship with animals like them, who will be friendly and accommodating, while the animal’s predators, prey, or natural enemies will also react accordingly. Supernaturals may be able to get a feel for the animal presence as well, as well as sensitive mortals. There’s a bit of discussion about religion and spirituality in here as well, as well as a disharmonious crawling-in-my-skin phase (also known as ‘puberty’) just before the First Change.

(There’s also a sidebar about what the animal experience may be like according to Scientists, with such gems as ‘recognizes cause and effect’ among more psychologically important bits.)

Finally, the First Change arrives from some sudden outside stimulus, like a fight, bullies, car crash, overdose, or something similar. The Frenzies/Rages are back in horribly ill-fitting suits this time, and the new feral either goes into a Rabbit Run (Fear Frenzy) or a Tiger Storm (Frenzy/Death Rage) as fitting the situation/animal and proceeds to run like a coward and/or tear shit up. The book says the behavior will happen no matter if you need to run through a fire or “tear up a bus full of nuns.” Because animals are retards.

By the way, Lunacy - the fugue-like madness and memory loss that overtakes people when they see a Werewolf in a hybrid form that comes from Luna protecting them and their existence - is also back with a shoddy coat of paint, called Delusion. It also apparently dragged Vampire’s ‘blur out cameras and video’ mechanic into the back alley and beat it to death before wearing it like a cheap suit. This is the first major hint that the mechanics of this book are either shamelessly cannibalized or original and broken/useless.

After this, the feral must come to an accord with their Nahual, with suggestions like adopting a pet, “making clothing or costumes that match their spirit animal,” “making self portraits of their animal self,” and “joining groups of ‘Otherkin’ - people who believe (sometimes correctly) that they’re not entirely human.” That’s right, Furcon is really crawling with people who can actually turn into Street Sharks.

I’m around a tenth of the way into the book and I’m already all

Oh yeah, they also introduce the Morality mechanic which is literally Harmony copy-pasted from Werewolf with names switched around. The Accords are brought up again, but I already mentioned them. To reiterate, they’re Mama Bear, Serial Killer, Engineer, Kender, and Oracle.

Now, we get to the power animals, the breed types, the Nahual, the actual what the fuck you are of the game. There’s a lot of them, so I’ll just copy and paste.

• The Bastet — Named for their most notorious godhead, these cat-folk range from supple wildcats to noble yet implacable weretigers.
• The Land Titans — The rarest but most powerful shapechangers, these elephant- and rhino-men seem more like endangered gods than mortal beings.
• The Laughing Strangers — Tricksters, robbers, beautiful eccentrics…how much of the reputation of these weasel-, rat-, hare-, coyote- and fox-folk is earned, and how much is propaganda?
• The Pack — Loyal yet ferocious, these cousins of the werewolves count wolfkin, dog-bloods and hyena-people among their ragged band.
• The Royal Apes — Despite their brutish stereotype, these uncomfortably man-like beasts include sagacious mystics along with tree-swinging tricksters.
• The Spinner-Kin — Grandmother Spider weaves her web across the world, and while her children seem quite sinister, they create the most beautiful designs imaginable.
• The Ursara — From shy black-furs to ferocious grizzlies, these werebears boast potent medicine and terrifying rage.
• The Wind-Runners — Stags, elk, horses and deer blend grace, speed and strength with human cunning and an urge for freedom.
• The Wing-Folk — Corvians, swan maids, owl-folk, even werebats are joined by their outstretched wings and the open sky.

I can still think of a bunch of examples that don’t fit anywhere - like, oh, say, where the fuck are all the reptiles, fish, insects, amphibians, and all that in general? The answer is shoehorned into an index in the back. This is the problem of trying to categorize shapeshifters, there is a metric fuckton of animals you can use. Even with the handwave of “it has to be powerful and respected so no werelemmings or whatever” that’s still an unspeakable amount of animals, with several stuffed into categories that don’t fit. War against the Pure, a book late in the Werewolf run, had a chapter dedicated to pretending Changing Breeds never happened and just gave you a toolbox to make whatever the fuck you wanted. Wereroach? Go nuts. Were-electric-eel? Totally possible. Werelobster? Knock yourself out. Were-waterbear? Okay, that’s pushing it.

What I’m trying to say is this book makes me hate its mechanics before we even hit the mechanical chapters.

Speaking of which, the only three forms a Changing Breed has by default are human, animal, and warform (hybrid), with near-human and near-animal bought as an upgrade. Silver also hurts them for absolutely no in-game reason beyond “they’re kinda like werewolves so fuck it.”

The book segues into discussion of Feral Clans and general upbringing, whether that’s people beating the evil out of their kids, smothering their freedom with it, or being accepting. There’s also discussion of how some depraved clans keep themselves going through incest and implied bestiality. I hate this fucking book.

There’s also discussion of ‘urban tribes’ a lone shifter may fit into, such as druggies, bums, carnies, gangs, and…

Furries and Therians
Who better to choose as a feral tribe than people who already believe they’re animals at heart? Whether they take the idea seriously or regard it as a playful kink, furries and various therians (people who feel like animals at heart) envision themselves as non-human souls trapped in human form. They share a feral’s deep affinity for certain beasts and animal behavior. True, the furries and therians’ idea of “animal” is often idealized, but such folks make excellent friends for people with truly wild hearts…so long as they don’t wind up with real hearts bleeding on their living-room floors.

And after that, things start getting uncomfortable. Like, really, really uncomfortable. Discussions of love life uncomfortable, which paints werebeasts as a bunch of emotionally abusive psychos who either bluntly attempt to fuck or rape whoever they’ve got the hots for. And then, we get the most horrible paragraph in any World of Darkness book, old or new, including the infamous Savage Genitalia power from Freak Legions (which Phil helped write, remember.)

I have permanently stained Imgur, this website, my eyes, and your mind to show you what we’re dealing with, here. nWerewolf went well out of its way to slap the shit of people who wanted to do creepy sex stuff involving shapeshifting and animals, including an entire section in one of the books about Werewolf physiology regarding to reproduction and how trying anything aside from the usual is going to end horribly (and, if two werewolves have sex, it ends in a horrible ghost abortion that tries to kill its parents because it hates them so much for making it exist.)

And Changing Breeds goes “yeah, nah, ignore that, FUCK EVERYTHING THAT MOVES.”

There’s more to the chapter involving Feral society on the minimal scale (the coterie/pack/cabal equivalent), but I just…I can’t say anything more after that image.

Next time: we all desperately try to forget what we’ve seen and hope that the mechanics aren’t a complete pile of shit. Spoilers: we’re going to be disappointed.